A Revelstoke woman has come forward to share her story after being drugged by a man she met on Tinder.
“I wanted to reach out to the community in some way to bring awareness or attention to these types of incidences that are likely happening more than we may think,” she said. “Another positive outcome from a story, may be more women reaching out and reporting their stories in connection to the man who did this to me or others like him.”
The woman, who the Mountaineer is referring to as L, said she chatted with the man over several days, including phone calls and video chats, prior to deciding to meet in person.
“We had chatted a bit more than I would normally chat to someone on Tinder. We had talked on the phone and Face-timed, so I felt pretty comfortable,” she said.
L initially told the man, who lives in another city, he couldn’t come to Revelstoke because she has a roommate and had concerns about COVID-19. The man told L he would rent a hotel room as he wanted to cook for her. He also told her he did not have any expectations and that she did not have to stay if she didn’t feel comfortable.
“He said all the right things. I wasn’t nervous at all,” said L.
On December 20, L went to meet the man at a local vacation rental he had booked.
Woman says she’s glad she let others know of plan to meet man she met on dating app
“I told my roommate where I was going and what room we were in. In hindsight I’m glad I did that,” she said.
L arrived at the suite the man cooked dinner while the two chatted over a few drinks. She said she was initially drinking slowly because she had not decided if she wanted to drive home later. L said the man commented on her slow drinking asking “is something wrong with it?”
“I told him he’s pretty much a stranger, it’s different for women,” said L, who was also text messaging back and forth with her roommate, something the man also commented on. “He was very aware of that. He would say, ‘Oh! Your roommate is messaging you again.’”
Eventually, L decided she felt comfortable and messaged her roommate to let her know she had decided to have a couple more drinks. L asked her roommate if she could would come and get her if she wanted a ride, to which the roommate responded yes. Over the next few hours, L had a few more drinks. All of the drinks L and the man consumed throughout the evening were made by the man. L said most of those were mixed drinks, which the man was making using a water bottle.
Around 11 p.m., approximately five hours after she had arrived, L says she began feeling sick and started to get really tired.
“My last drink I was sipping slow because I was not feeling good. He kept trying to cheers me to get my drink down faster,” she said. “I got up to go to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror. I remember thinking, ‘I look like I’m high.’ My pupils were massive and I was freezing and thirsty. I started to panic thinking ‘he’s drugged me’.”
L said she wanted to phone a friend, but felt she couldn’t do so with the man in front of her. The man then asked if she wanted to lie down, and asked if she wanted to lay with him. L did lay down, but told the man she did not want him to lie down with her. He then went into the kitchen and she used that opportunity to contact her roommate. She tried calling a friend, who didn’t answer. She then called her roommate but hung up because she was afraid to talk on the phone. After hanging up, she texted her roommate “please come get me.”
She said the man returned to the room a couple of times suggesting she would feel more comfortable if she got undressed and offering to help take her pants off. L kept telling the man she was fine and did not want to remove her clothes.
“Finally he said ‘OK, I get it.’ I think his intentions were to have sex with me, but I don’t know for sure.”
The woman’s friend arrived about half an hour after she had called. L said she then stumbled out of the room and told the man she had to leave.
“I didn’t know what he was going to do, I didn’t want to make the situation worse so I told him, “Everything’s fine, don’t worry.” I even gave him a kiss and said, ‘See you tomorrow,’ because we had planned on going skiing.”
Drinks spiked with MDMA, methamphetamine
On the drive home, L called the police to report what had happened. She says initially she did not feel supported by the RCMP officer, who told her it was “her story against his.” Police did, however, attend the vacation suite and question the man.
The following morning, on the insistence of friends, L went to emergency at Queen Victoria Hospital. There it was discovered she had been drugged with methamphetamine and MDMA. She then called the RCMP again, and says the officer she spoke to then took her more seriously, asking if she would come to the station to give a statement and file a report. L, her roommate and her friend all gave statements to police.
“[The RCMP] are now building a case, hopefully they question him and something comes of that. Hopefully there are some sort of repercussions for his actions. This is premeditated and he brought drugs with him to do this. If he’s done it once, he’ll do it again,” she said.
L told the Mountaineer she is unsure of what the man’s intentions were, given that he was also consuming the drinks mixed in the water bottle.
“I’m not sure if he was on drugs too, but towards the end he seemed paranoid and his pupils were really big. It [MDMA and methamphetamine] seems like a weird thing to drug someone with. It’s hard to know what his intentions were,” she said.
A day after the incident took place, the man messaged her saying he was sorry about what had happened and told her “you’re such a rad girl.”
She said the RCMP had already told the man not to contact her.
If you have been a victim of sexual assault, or attempted sexual assault, help is available. In 2019, the Revelstoke Women’s Shelter Society announced a community-specific response to sexual assault.
Revelstoke Victim Services (250-837-9260) can provide information on what reporting to RCMP looks like, what accessing medical support at Queen Victoria Hospital looks like, as well as provide in-person supports for those who seek medical care or choose to file a report.
Queen Victoria Hospital (250-837-2131). The hospital has a team of nurses trained in helping those who have, or may have experienced drink spiking and/or sexual assault.
Revelstoke RCMP (250-837-5255 or 911). Reporting to the RCMP is optional. Even if you choose not to report, Revelstoke RCMP can provide information and connect you with Victim Services and other available supports.
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